When your brain says yes but your soul says no

Hello dear followers,

Today I decided to write about something more deeper than fashion. The sensation of your soul. There comes a time when everybody has gut feelings/ inner senses about something and has to make a decision on whether or not to follow these senses.

Last week I made a very important life decision which was not to get married to my then long-term partner. He was perfect for me in many ways but something was holding me back from getting excited about the idea of marriage. This was something I wanted I thought for a long time, but I guess after 10 years I grew bored of the idea and all I desired at this stage was freedom

( freedom of my soul to be specific) don’t get me wrong, he was never possessive or jealous in anyway. I could go/ do whatever I wanted when I wanted within moral grounds of course. I was practically by myself as we were doing long distance but for some reason I craved even more distance. Maybe it was due to long distance or loving my personal life too much that our relationship ended. Or maybe he really was not the right guy for me or maybe even he was but then life had different plans for me. Not too sure all I knew was that I needed to end it now without even having a valid reason to end it except for the fact that I felt my inner instincts saying get out of this while you can.

One week later and I am still feeling confident and strong about the decision I made. I went through 3 weeks of intense indecisiveness that really caused havoc to my body. No sleep, non stop thinking, anxiety, binge eating, heart palpitations, vomiting, no concentration on anything all I could do was to try numb the anxiety by going out partying/ drinking/ eating. But once I made that all important decision in my head, everything felt ok again. I felt peaceful. Tears of joy came over me and I wrote a diary entry ( I don’t even keep a diary) to mark that important day in my life.

I feel excited about life and at the same time peaceful in my soul knowing that I am giving it what it so desperately craves.

Have you guys made any life changing decisions lately and do you tend to go with your brain or your gut instincts when making these decisions?